Well, it's been a good run . .

Not done here, but . . .  it's been a busy couple of weeks.

Last week I had three job interviews and got some volunteer work lined up. None of those paid jobs worked out, and I was fine with that. You know how you just kind of get an ominous vibe during the interview? And you don't have anything else lined up, so if you get a job offer you know you have to take it, but you really don't want to? That happened. Luckily they had somewhat the same feelings about me, and told me so.

I'd kind of like to add here that I've noticed something I've started doing in recent job interviews. I don't know if it was really a conscious choice, or what. Maybe talking with people at the employment department did boost my confidence enough that I finally felt I had the power or the right to do this: Just be brutally honest in interviews.

When asked in a phone interview this week if I had knowledge or experience with machinery, I bluntly said "Yeah, not really", instead of "Not really, but I'm willing and excited to learn!!". At a clothing store interview, they asked me if I'd be comfortable pushing people to sign up for credit cards, and instead of saying "Oh, I've done this kind of thing before, I could pick this up, no trouble,", I said "I'll be honest, it'll probably take me a little while to get comfortable with that.". And by 'a little while', I meant 'a long time', or more likely, 'probably never'. I just didn't want these jobs enough to be dishonest about the kind of person I am to get them. Just the way it is now. Feels pretty good, too

This brings me to this past Tuesday. I had an interview at a grocery store. I didn't necessarily want this job more than others that I had applied for. I was honest in the interview. When he asked me  about my long and short-term goals, I admitted that what I'd really like to do is write in one way or another. When he asked about disagreements I'd had with co-workers in the past, I didn't lie just so I could demonstrate problem-solving skills; I was upfront and said it hasn't really come up because generally I can get along with just about anyone. At work anyway.

I feel like the stars aligned a little bit with this interview too, because I didn't feel sickeningly nervous like I have in past interviews. The manager I interviewed with seemed genuinely impressed that I had my Bachelor's degree, told me he took notes on my "great" resume, and seemed to be enthusiastic and supportive about my future writing goals. And at the end of the interview he seemed excited to offer me the job.

I got the job. I'm gonna have money again. And maybe a life.

Instead of saying "So much for the English Major's Job Search", I think the focus of the blog is just going to shift a little bit. While I'm working, I'm still going to be writing and developing interests outside of work. I'm aware that I could make this job that I have now my career, but I'm also aware that if I do, I've just spent three years and more money than I'm willing to mention wasting my time. And I'm done wasting time.

Maybe the name of the blog will change, but probably not, because I'm lazy that way. It is still sort of a job search anyway, since I'm still looking for a way to put the skills I learned at school to work. I'm going to be stepping out of my comfort zone, making mistakes, and falling on my face, which I've always been painfully afraid of. So who doesn't want to read about that, really?

So I hope you'll come back, because the blog continues! Probably! (kidding! . . . I think!)

Interview Hell

Hey Guys,

This week I want to talk about interviews and my hate/hate relationship with them. I haven't quite figured out yet how to pass an interview with flying colors. I usually leave them feeling jittery (not in a good way), tallying up all the mistakes I made, and cursing myself for not carrying band-aids in my purse, as my cuticles and the skin around my fingernails is often bloody and raw after an interview.

I have reason to believe that I got my first job based on the fact that I had a car to get there, and I was available in the evenings. That's kind of it. I had no prior job experience, aside from baby-sitting, but the job was part-time in a beauty supply store in the mall. I could be trained easily enough ( I wasn't, but now's not the time for that story!). My second job I still don't know how I got, I just remember that I damn near cried because I was so nervous. This was a job in a dollar store. You read that right.

A dollar store.

Same thing happened with my third job, I was so nervous that I imagine I resembled The Joker with my wide-eyed, ear-to-ear grin. This apparently sat very well with the store manager, who told the head supervisor "Well, she gets the green light from me", before the supervisor took me to her office to go over availability.

This kind of experience is what the norm is for me in a job interview. Well, maybe not the whole getting-of-the-job thing, but the wide-eyed nervousness and overcompensating smile happens more often than not. Doesn't matter how well-prepared I am ahead of time, or how well I've researched the company. As soon as I get in the building, the nervous energy kicks in.

A couple of weeks ago, I had an interview at a department store. While I made it through the interview with the skin around my fingernails intact, I still feel like I looked too overexcited or nervous to be there.

Why?

Seriously, I'm asking. Why is it like that? It might have something to do with being conscious of the fact that I have to impress these people. That's the whole point of the meeting. I've never enjoyed this, and I don't think I've been particularly good at it, not just in the career category, but in most areas of my life. That's why I often cringed when I had to do a presentation in class (especially solo presentations. . . I like having other people to lean on a little bit), or even just hand in a paper.

So my next question is: what does it take? How do I go in there and treat these interviews like they're no big deal? Does it all just have to do with an attitude shift, and that's most, if not all of the battle? Sure. I 'm sure it does. I've had this thought before, and I've had people lecture me on it as well. But this is where I begin working myself into a frenzy. How do I do that??? It's so much easier said than done.

I guess I don't have any concrete answers to the questions I've posed here, and the point of this particular post is to say "Hey, who's with me? You get those feelings too?"  Sorry. I don't know if I should be, but I am. I feel like if I'm taking the time to write this, that I should at least have some valuable advice to offer, but I kind of don't this time. I guess if anyone does have any advice, or even just anything to add, feel free to leave a comment, but otherwise that's what I've got for you this time.

P.S. I realize it's been a while since I've posted . . . or maybe it just feels that way to me. I would like these to be more frequent though, and I've started making a list of topics I can discuss. See ya next time.